I have never been an avid romance reader. Nevertheless, I am human and I believe that occasionally everybody needs to hear a good love story.

Which Witch, which I happened to read in the February I was twelve, was one of the first love stories I ever read and it completely captured my heart. It was written by the British author, Eva Ibbotson, and was published in 1979.

It often amuses me the way we think love stories are intended for grown-ups, yet the fairy tales we tell children are filled with tales of love and adoration. Cinderella dances with her handsome prince at the ball. Sleeping Beauty is awakened with a kiss from Prince Charming. Rapunzel’s admirer is so betrothed with her that he bravely climbs up into a high tower, night after night. Similarly, we often think that fairy tales or children’s books are not meant to be read by grown-ups. I think, however, that it is necessary for all adults to read a children’s story at least once in a while. Sometimes, we just need to hear a message with the simplicity and sincerity of a children’s book to make it hit home again. So, if you do not have a child to read this story to, read it to yourself!

In Which Witch, an enchanting, but very anti-social wizard called Arriman decides that it is time to find a wife and start a family. This cannot just be any woman, of course, but has to be an accomplished and talented witch from his region. With the help of his secretary, they organise a contest in order to determine which witch will be most suitable to become his new wife.

The seven competitors are a peculiar bunch of characters, to say the least. The young and sweet Belladonna immediately falls hopelessly in love with the grouchy Arriman, but barely even qualifies to enter the contest. Madame Olympia is probably the most impressive witch the judges have ever seen, but her stony coldness hardly makes her appealing as a wife.

After having a sneak peek at the contestants, Arriman, who was anxious to begin with, goes into a new state of panic. He has no idea which woman will suit him, if any. At the end of the tale, it is the age-old lesson that he learns: the element to value and treasure, is love. Talents and skills and powers and reputations will come and go and falter with time, but love is the attribute that will accompany you till the end of your life.

I cannot say much more about the course of events without spoiling the ending, so I would rather leave you to read it by yourself or with your children. What I can do, in the spirit of Valentine’s Day, is to reveal seven humble lessons that Which Witch teaches us about love and life:

1. Love endures embarrassment and sacrifice.
Arriman’s parents had a hard time raising a wizard as a son. To have the best for him, they endured embarrassment and gave up many comforts, not to mention they gave up having a “normal” life. It was not easy for them, but they would never for a second have considered having it any other way.

2.  Your courting skills do not make you who you are.
Even geniuses and very talented and wise people feel uncomfortable when it comes to romance. But do not despair, even if romance and dating make you flustered, you too can find love. The right person for you will be able to see through your nerves and discomposure, right into your heart.

3. Don’t give up hope when you feel your life has reached a point where nothing is working anymore.
Admitting that your life has come to a dead end might be because your situation has become really dreadful. It could also be because you are finally ready and willing to take a step towards change and growth. Admitting that it is time for a transformation is a brave thing to do.

4. If you want to be prettier, be happier.
You might not be able to make yourself more attractive, but you can aim to become a happier person. When a person is not too high up on the good-looking scale, it does not seem to matter when that person is a happy person.

5. When you love somebody, you should have their happiness in mind.
It might not be your responsibility to make your loved ones happy, but their happiness should be a priority for you. Life is filled with challenges and ordeals. We all need that somebody who is willing to help chase those clouds away on the rainy days.

6. If you feel you haven’t reached your purpose yet, it might just be because you have underestimated your purpose.
If you have set out on a path that you believe to be destined for you, don’t give up hope simply because you haven’t achieved everything you have hoped for, yet. Destinies that are greater than you expect will take a bit longer to reach than you expect. The important thing is to keep going! A holiday every now and then will work wonders, but do not give up!

7. Love, is what matters.
Yes, this one is somewhat cliché, but we need to be reminded that love matters and, when it does, a lot of other things do not. Fading looks or talents won’t matter. Mistakes can be overlooked and forgiven. Competitions and awards and impressing one another will not matter. Because, when you truly love somebody, that should be what matters.

Eva Ibbotson was born on 21 January 1925 in Vienna, where she lived the first eight years of her life. Her parents separated while she was still a toddler. She moved to England with her father, her mother following a year later.

Ibbotson initially pursued a career in natural sciences, which turned out to be a fortuitous choice, as it led her to meet the love of her life at the age of twenty. However, she knew the sciences were not meant for her and after she married her husband, at age twenty-two, she took the brave step to give up her short-lived career, raise four children and pursue education. Although she wrote down stories since the age of seven, she did not have anything published until she was 50. She went on to publish more than twenty novels for children and adults before she died at the age of 85. What a great inspiration for writers who think that it might be too late in their lives to get a work published. Sometimes in life, you might take a detour before reaching the place you really want to be, but that is no reason to give up hope and not make the most of the life experience you have gained.

Ibbotson died on 20 October 2010. Besides her delightful children’s books such as The Secret of Platform 13, The Ogre of Oglefort and The Great Ghost Rescue, she had also captivated many adult readers with her historically inspired novels such as A Song for Summer, A Countess below Stairs and The Morning Gift.